Representing The Brand

REPRESENTING THE BRAND

Our mission team hits the road/air - very early this morning!

Early this morning (5:00 am to be precise) our mission team to Central America met at the American Airlines check-in at Tampa International Airport. Andrew flew all the way from Italy to take part, and we left our house at 4:24 am! But I didn’t just drop him off, I touched base with the entire group.

Why? Because I’m the preachers’s spouse. I’ll try to explain:

MY TOPIC OF INTEREST IN TODAY’S POST IS THE AREA OF “BEING THERE.” Every preacher in the world is spread thin; it’s a fact of ministry that it’s impossible to satisfactorily stay ahead. Even if a church has just 25 active members it’s impossible for the preacher to keep up. One crisis can sometimes take an entire day and then the week’s schedule is already shot!

It helps that First Presbyterian of Brandon has amazing elders, creative ministry teams with excellent leadership, an active Stephen Ministry, and variety of nurturing small groups – plus three pastors on staff (Rebekah, Tim and Earl). But that doesn’t mean there aren’t still anywhere from one to a dozen places and events happening at any given moment where the senior pastor’s presence is expected, anticipated or at the very least desired.

AND THAT, MY FRIENDS IS WHY there’s a whole category of “preacher’s spouse-ness” known as, “There’s no way I can make it could you possibly just show up?” Some people call this, “Taking one for the team.” Or, “Representing the brand.” Also understood as “unofficial ceremonial stand-in.”

Typically what I’m talking about is not even officially “unofficial.” Most of the time my being there isn’t even a conscious something that anyone would necessarily take note of or point out if it didn’t happen. But it’s meaningful all the same, BECAUSE THE GIFT OF PRESENCE IS ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS WE HAVE TO OFFER AS THE PREACHER’S SPOUSE.

LET ME SHARE A COUPLE OF EXAMPLES. This morning was one. Obviously I was taking Andrew to the airport because he’s our son and we love him. But skipping my usual “drop off” and going inside, then making sure I spoke to everyone in the mission team, and saying “Blessings” and “Peace” as they headed out through the first security checkpoint… these were all “preachers’ spouse things”, and they were qualitatively different because of that fact.

I’m also talking about:

• SOME OF THE WEDDINGS OR FUNERALS I ATTEND
• RECEPTIONS I HAVE SLIPPED INTO LONG ENOUGH TO SHAKE SOME PARTICULAR HANDS
• CHECKS I’VE WRITTEN AND CAUSES I SUPPORT
• GIRL SCOUT COOKIES I’VE PURCHASED
• RETIREMENTS… GRADUATIONS… EVEN SOME PARTIES I’VE CRASHED!
• HOSPITAL WAITING ROOMS I’VE PRAYED IN
• AWARDS CEREMONYS I’VE APPLAUDED
• TOASTS I’VE GIVEN
• CONCERTS I’VE SAT THROUGH
• SPORTING EVENTS I’VE CHEERED AT… YOU GET THE PICTURE.

And it’s not even true that I wouldn’t have been at some of these events anyway. But there is something about the quality of presence and the fact that I’m there without Rebekah that states – pretty clearly – “The pastor at First Presbyterian is here in spirit, is thinking about what’s going on, and has you in her prayers.”

As preacher’s husbands we are pleased to have this awesome opportunity to make our own way, because there is no stereotype to fill. But that doesn’t mean we don’t still – sometimes:

• WEAR A TIE WHEN WE DIDN’T WANT TO
• ATTEND A WEDDING WE’D RATHER SKIP
• SHAKE AN EXTRA HAND (OF SEVERAL HUNDRED)
• MISS A GAME WE WANTED TO SEE
• KISS A CHEEK WE’D RATHER NOT
• LAUGH AT A JOKE THAT WASN’T FUNNY
• EAT A PEANUT-BUTTER PIE THAT MADE ME GAG (THAT’S A WHOLE STORY OF ITS OWN)…

It’s called being there, the ministry of presence, the ambassadorship of the office.

Together to sign the floor of the new Discipleship Center

We’ve all been seated at the tail end of the head table at a public event, resisting the urge to visit our smart phone when the program gets tedious. And we acknowledge how much more fun it is when “The Preacher” is with us.

But it goes with the territory, and the majority of time I’m honestly thankful for the opportunity to be identified with such a dynamic ministry. We’re better together, always, but if there’s anything I can do to extend the ministry of presence… I’m there.

Just don’t forget to feed me!

Tags: AMBASSADOR, CEREMONY, CLERGY, MINISTRY, MISSION, PRESENCE,WOMAN PREACHER

In the News This Morning!

BREAKING NEWS! WELCOME TO THIS BLOG SITE:

Derek & Rebekah Maul - Image by KATY KUEHNER - Tribune staff photographer

Exciting day! This morning, Saturday July 23, the Tampa Tribune has published a feature about yours-truly and Rebekah.  “BRANDON PREACHER’S HUSBAND CONTENT WITH UNCONVENTIONAL ROLE”  The article was written by the Trib’s religion editor, Michelle Bearden. Michelle did a fine job presenting a positive story and giving readers a clear look at what it means to be a clergy-spouse – regardless of denomination or gender.

AS A WRITER, I FIND IT NERVE-RACKING to let someone else tell some of my story. Rebekah and I have both been misquoted in the past, and have been embarrassed when journalists completely missed the point of a seemingly straightforward interview. So it is refreshing to read a well-honed report put together by someone who knows how to listen as well as write. So kudos to Michelle Bearden.

SOME NEWSPAPER SUBSCRIBERS WILL BE READING THIS BLOG as a direct result of reading this morning’s article. Welcome! I hope you’ll come back and visit again.

I’ll keep this post brief and I simply encourage you to take a look around. Scroll down, click on the links, and read some of the content. You can also look on the right hand side of the page for your choice of recent articles, or to connect to my daily blog, “The Life-Charged Life.”

I recommended “WELCOME TO THE PREACHER’S HUSBAND BLOG AT WORDPRESS”, down at the bottom of the list; it offers a helpful overview of some of the issues I’ve discussed or will be addressing in future posts.

Then, check out “WHAT YOU SEE IS WHAT YOU GET (AND OTHER REASONS IT’S GOING TO BE GREAT TO BE A GRANDDADDY!)”. It will give a good look at our family.

Thanks so much for dropping by! I look forward to future visits, your comments and (this is important) please recommend this site to your friends. I have a lot to share and I don’t want anyone to miss out.

Also, if you don’t have a church home, you are very welcome to worship with us at FIRST PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH OF BRANDON.

Peace, Love and Blessings – DEREK

- Check out WWW.DEREKMAUL.COM for links to books and other info…

WHAT YOU SEE IS WHAT YOU GET (AND OTHER REASONS IT’S GOING TO BE GREAT TO BE A GRANDADDY)

"The Preacher" in Charleston last week

There’s a chapter in my new book, “REACHING TOWARD EASTER” (Upper Room Books – September 2011), where I ask the following rhetorical question: ”What do Rebekah (my wife), Naomi (my daughter) and Scout (Rebekah’s fuzzy, galumphing, 75 pound labradoodle) have in common? Warning, this is a hard one.” (pictures lined up to the right…)

Here’s how it goes from there:

First off, they’re all girls! Right… but that was the easy answer.

"The Daughter" last week

The characteristic I’m getting at would actually be fairly obvious if you knew them. They all have a pure, “What you see is what you get” approach to life. Put another way, there’s not an ounce of pretense among them.

This means they don’t play games (well, Scout likes to play “tug the rope”, and “chase the dog if you ever want to see your wallet alive again”, and Naomi’s pretty good at pool – but that’s not the kind of game-playing I’m talking about).

What I’m talking about is their “lack of duplicity” quality.

"The Labradoodle" this afternoon!

It’s a “Let’s not waste time with airs and political correctness” approach to life. It’s all about their “Cut to the chase why don’t we?” response to most everything (Okay, Scout likes to play chase but that’s something else too).

It’s a kind of purity, but not really – maybe more like the gift of living without half-measures or enjoying relationships without the cloudiness of compromise; it’s resisting the urge to allow cynicism any room at all.

It’s about authenticity. It’s about being real.

THE ABOVE IS ONE MORE REASON I’m excited that “The Preacher’s Husband” is – soon – going to be a Grandaddy! If my theory holds, and this “Authenticity” principle gets concentrated more and more the further down the food chain it goes (you know, like mercury in a tuna-fish), then the much-anticipated debut of David Henry Campbell into this world is going to involve one extremely “shoot-from-the-hip” child who will be something to behold… and experience!

And – get this – his Grandmother is a Preacher!

THIS WEEK, “The Preacher” is in Connecticut, helping to put together the nursery for David Henry’s arrival in October. I’m getting a lot done in terms of writing, but it is so much better to be together. Rebekah and I have been married almost 32 years, and we enjoy each other’s company as much today – if not more so – as when we first met.

I know some guys who like to get some time away from their wives. “I get to do stuff I can’t get away with otherwise!” one told me. Well I’ve got to be honest, I can’t think of anything from this week I wouldn’t be comfortable with Rebekah knowing about (with the possible exception of that entire pizza I ate last night!). I’m keeping the kitchen spotless, I’m making the bed every morning, I’m on top of the laundry, I plan on vacuuming Friday, and even Scout is going to be fluffed up and pristine when Rebekah’s plane gets in Friday night.

But you know what? It all feels fairly pointless when Rebekah’s not here to share it with me.

That’s life here in The Preacher’s house. It’s just better to be together.

Rebekah, Derek, Naomi (David Henry), Craig

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Is this communion... or is this communion....?

Tom serves his daughter, Faith

Here’s a question: PART I – Is this communion?

In this picture (to the right) Tom – my brother-in-law, is serving the bread and the wine to Faith – his daughter. Ed, who is watching Tom, had just been served by his wife – Rebekah’s cousin Zandra.

We came together for worship as a family (various Alexanders and sundry Perkins’s), as a family of believers (various Presbyterians and sundry Methodists and an assortment of other blends and flavors), and as an extended human family representing at least three continents.

Rebekah brings the message to the family

Rebekah gave the message, and her brother Jesse served communion; they are both ordained Presbyterian ministers serving churches in Florida. Jesse, Micah and I led the singing. And Anthony Perkins, who is a commissioned lay-minister in the Methodist Church, gave the benediction.

Coming together as a worshipping community is always a meaningful occasion, and I especially look forward to the first Sunday of every month, when we celebrate communion together at First Presbyterian in Brandon. But when your extended family is also the family of believers… and when the church family is also your family of brothers and sisters and cousins… then something exponential happens in terms of what it means to break bread together.

So is this communion....?

And so – PART II – is thiscommunion? The picture I’m referencing here is the melee of covered dish lunch after church! Cousins elbowing and laughing and serving one-another from the shared table. For the adults, just watching this part of the feast conjured memories of gatherings past – and isn’t communion all about remembering?

This we did in remembrance not only of Jesus, who first offered the bread and the wine, but in memory of Nell Perkins Alexander – Rebekah’s mama, who died just a short while after the big family gathering at St Mary’s in 1999… and of Bob Alexander – Rebekah’s dad, who departed this life just two weeks prior to Naomi’s marriage to Craig in 2007… and of Al Perkins, and Grandaddy Albert and Grand-May….

And we shared communion in the bread and the wine and the squash and the chicken and the potato salad and the tomatoes….

As complete a Perkins-Alexander family portrait as is possible given the far-flung nature of our loved-ones....

Or – PART III – is thiscommunion? One more big family portrait. But Naomi and Craig were still on the road from Connecticut… and Andrew was at his home in Tuscany… and Rebekah’s brother Roy and his wife, Lynda, were worshipping with the church where Lynda was recently appointed as music director… and the Jesse Perkins family were already back in Sylvania… and Zandra’s brother, Albert, insisted he needed to be with his cows in Newington….

But family gatherings without some of the family are communion just the same.Because we acknowledge the communion of the saints – and that doesn’t just include the “dear departed” but the reticent, and the recalcitrant, and the traveler, and the ex-patriot, and the lost, and the angry, and the sick, and the tired, and the distracted, and the hurt, and the estranged, and those who want to be there but simply can’t….

Sharing the word

Preach it, Rebekah! “He (and she) has God’s mark on him,” Rebekah said as she preached her way through Genesis, all the way from the beginning, where God said “this is good” to the reunion of Joseph with his long-lost family, where it was good once again.

She was referring to the fact that God’s love, and care, and purpose for us far out-reaches the temporary detours we often take. God is faithful and God’s promise is – like the Covenant with Abraham – new every morning and to every generation. Things in the Genesis story became “good” again only when Joseph lived his life in the truth of that bountiful promise.

The answer, of course, to the communion question, “Is this communion, or is thiscommunion, or is this communion….?” is – “YES”!

“For where two or three are gathered in my name,” Jesus said, “I am there among them.” And, believe me, Jesus was there last Sunday morning, and it means so much to be a member of that kind of a family.

- DEREK

Jesse, Micah and Derek leading an arrangement of "How great thou art."